Luke Skywalker on Force Unleashed

Come on? Luke Skywalker and Obi-Wan? Apparently they are coming to the Force Unleashed as skins with new missions on a DLC. It doesn't feel right them shooting Dark Force Lighting. This is supposed to be DARK.

What about General Grievous or even Jabba The Hutt.? I know they are not Jedis but they would have been way more badass. But typical George Lucas, he still thinks Luke Skywalker is cool. Like..duh get real. We have all played emo Luke since Super Star Wars on the Super Nintendo and no one wants to play him anymore. Even Uncle Owen or Biggs rocks out more than Luke Skywalker.

I haven't actually played Force Unleashed yet as I am waiting for SHADYSHEEDY to send me his copy. (!!) Except he played for it 12 hours the other day on the hardest setting and didn't get the achievement because he didn't play the prologue. Dude..what are you doing? Get over it and hurry up.

Ki-Adi-Mundi and Kit Fisto are also included in the skins. Like wow. Correct me if I am wrong, but didn't these useless characters die well before this story? I don't know, it is all messed up now. Bring back Yoda as a puppet and let me play as Jabba!

MMO on the PSP?

Excuse the acronyms. But according to this article on MTV looks like the Sony PSP gets bigger and better. Sales in Japan for the Playstation Portable and Nintendo DS outsell the Wii, and Sony are considering Massively Multiplayer Online Games for their portable. But what are Microsoft doing about a portable Xbox? Nothing. Instead, they worry about what outfits are available for our avatars.

I have been a long advocate for an Xbox 360 portable, as for so many others. They have already a portable device that can easily be modified to play Xbox Live Arcade games. The Zune. It supports XNA (Xbox game developer tool) and Windows Live Messenger, so connecting to Xbox Live should be easy. It has built in Wi-Fi. As for the controls, which have always been clunky on the PSP, how about just porting it to a regular controller, like they do with the Chatpad? Then we could just take our controllers anywhere, like around our neck.

Sure this would take some development, but Microsoft should do what they are good at. Steal. From their old buddies Apple. Buy an iPhone, get a screwdriver and take it apart. I am sure they have already and are probably still scratching their balls.. sorry heads about it. But seeing that the PSP sells 30,000 units a week in Japan alone, this should be enough incentive for Microsoft to forget about scratching their balls ... sorry heads again on avatars. As you have probably guessed, I loathe avatars. If I had a Lancer, I'd chainsaw them.

So hurry up Microsoft and make an Xbox 360 portable! Then I can take it to my mums when I go around for dinner and continue to shoot or chainsaw kill my friends.

Bejeweled on Call of Duty?

Bejeweled is set to become a playable game inside World of Warcraft, thanks to one bored amateur game maker. Wow, WoW must be boring then? Read the article here at Game Life. The game kindly disappears if you stumble into combat. I guess they need something while taking long flights across Azeroth? 

But I can see this as a future add on other games, like Gears of War or Call of Duty. Think about it. While in the live lobby waiting for your friends to join, press "B" and up pops Bejeweled. Then when the match begins, it disappears. 

I actually would prefer the option for it to stay on. I mean what if I am on a winning streak? I want to still be able to swap gems while braining someone in Headquarters. Or I could also play while "camping". (If you don't know what "camping" is, it is when you wait on top of the stairs for some n00b to come along. If don't what a n00b is, it is the one getting shot by the person camping) Press "B" for Bejeweled. 

I think the opportunities are limitless for Bejeweled achievements. Like achievements for getting "5 cascades while playing Team Deathmatch" would be a challenge. Then I wouldn't swear about getting shot, but missing out on a cascade. 

Sony Gets Boring

Home, Sony's virtual world social networking tool for the PS3, has been labelled "boring". Of course it is. Why would anyone want to walk around an empty room looking for friends? There is a reason why people purchase a game console.  To play games. We'll let Sony fiddle around with it more while they wait for the other shoe to drop.

UK magazine, Play has tried it out and found the initial curiosity quickly waned. "No GT5 garages, Trophy case or whorehouses" Just empty rooms. And every time you entered a new building, a loading screen would come up and load a 30-50 mb file. The trouble here is that Sony Ps3 lacks a decent live community, so there is no one there in the first place. Like Xbox Live avatars, a waste of space. Sony have so far spent 40 million on development of Home. They could have spent that developing a decent blockbuster title.

You know what Home needs? A gun. If you can go around shooting people, I mean how neat would that be? I would even buy the console just so I can enter Home and shoot people. It is the reason why most of us buy a console in the first place. So we can shoot people. It would be like The Sims : With A Gun. Or if someone just trash talked you in live game, go enter Home, find them, then shoot them there. Sony just lack imagination, that's their trouble.

Halo 3 Wants Your eBay Money

Halo 3 developers want some money when you sell your Halo 3 on eBay. That is if you believe this article. Yes, the pre-owned debate rolls on. "But it seems to me that the folks who create and publish a game shouldn’t stop receiving income from further sales.” this developer is quoted as saying.

I can understand somewhat their position here. Music performers and movies get royalties for sales and performances, where games just get the front end of sales. They don't get a royalty every time you play. But I just don't know how this is going to work. Sure, we shouldn't let some tight retailers who allow trade-ins, giving you a insignificant $5 or £2 quid for your Shrek The Third, but what if you sell your game on eBay? Gamers being able to trade games they’ve bought and finished is a GOOD thing. It means we can afford new turd.

I am not too sure about digital distribution. I mean it's great we can hide our games with digital downloads because there is nothing worse, when your mates come around and you have got a copy of Kung Fu Panda on the floor. But you will not be able to pass or re-sell a turd game if you download. If everyone thinks twice about downloading a turd game, then they won't make them and then I CAN'T GET EASY POINTS!

I know it's me, me, me attitude, but these developers are rich enough from front end sales. I just want the ability to play a turd game.

Three Words : Anger Management

I know I have skipped a day or two. I am seeing someone at the moment. A new anger management counsellor. Only because there is a new gun store opened up on the corner and I want to shoot my computer. Elvis used to shoot TV's when he didn't like the program, so why can't I?

If you know about my other website, you know the difficulties I have been having. Trouble is I have a few, each a "so-called" expert telling me I should do this or you should try that. I am a gamer, not a website designer, and all I ask is "a easy to use website" I get all sorts of coding advice, get bogged down in design and then error codes. Then I just want to give some friendly violence to my computer. After my flat mate hears my obscenities, he adds "I got three words for you : Anger Management" After kindly correcting him that it is actually two words, he suggests I play a game to relax.

Now here's a nice game, Mercenaries 2 , when you just want to blow things up. I load the disc in. "Disc Error" I calmly take the disc out and calmly approach my flat mate. "Dude, I need to borrow your driver's license because I need to go to that new gun store"

Activision Sue Pirates

Here's a curious site. Gamepolitics.com Not exactly a regular bookmark for your browser, unless you are the type who likes to sue a lot. But the leading article refers to Activision quietly suing individuals who copy their games.

I love the opening sentence. "Activision, the largest and richest video game publisher in the world..." So dramatic. They make Activision sound like the Evil Galactic Empire squashing a rebel ewok. Activision are within their rights to sue, but what is not clear in the article is exactly what each individual did. Why are they so secretive about it? If you want to deter piracy, ( I am of course speculating - note to Activision attorneys) then tell the world how you give them a nuclear wedgie if you ever get caught.

As for these individuals, Call of Duty 3 for the Wii? You deserve the fine for not paying your brain bill. Not exactly the hottest Call of Duty title available is it? But now that Activision have procured some funds, then they should stop bitching and pay their brain bills. That way they might see some sense and release Ghostbusters.

More on Xbox Avatars

This video cracks me up. My good friend, who still knocks back my friend requests, Major Nelson, is giving us a video tour of the new Xbox Live Avatar creation. I know I go on about this too much sometimes, but I am a dog with a bone, that can't seem to bury it.

Click on the right stick and your avatar burps. Please, who thought of that? Your ten year old kid brother? Double-click and it hurls. Where's Darth Vader helmet and naked feature you promised Major Nelson? I want to go naked and be fat and small like Eric Cartman wearing a Darth Vader helmet. Actually, you never promised these things because you actually never replied to my requests. In fact you still haven't replied to my cannibal game for the Xbox Live Arcade, and that was last October.

But what I want to know who is actually going to use this feature? Because if I am not going to use it, and you stress Major Nelson that I don't have to, then this kind of rubbish takes up valuable memory. I would be pretty peeved if I try save a game on Final Fantasy XIII, and I can't because the system memory has taken up 15 GB already. (I am guessing here, because the system has already taken 15 and I am assuming the update to overwrite the already system memory from my 120GB HD) I plan to save a lot on Final Fantasy XIII. Like a real lot.

So is anyone out there actually going to use this? Anyone? No? So lets kill it and bury it. 

<a href="http://video.msn.com/?mkt=en-US&playlist=videoByUuids:uuids:af0e0dcd-5cff-43a2-bd32-4841fe6a89d1&showPlaylist=true&from=shared" target="_new" title="Avatars in the new Xbox experience">Video: Avatars in the new Xbox experience</a>

This Game Sucks!

I read a lot of Xbox 360 magazines. Not because I am obsessed, but there's a lot to read when I take a dump. In fact my ex-girlfriend used to read a lot Xbox 360 magazines as well because of this. But have you noticed, they talk a lot of crap.

Not that the articles are rubbish, but they use a lot of compound nouns and adjectives just to say the game is retarded. Personally I prefer the crude language of the Xbox.com forums, especially on a new release blockbuster title. If you ever wished for 3,000 to 5,000 views on a forum topic in a week, just head into a popular title, let's say Call of Duty 5 for argument sake, and post your topic as "This game sucks!". Be objective, otherwise you will be labeled as a "troll". Guaranteed you will get a lot of vivid and vibrant replies as well.

But there is a huge advantage the forums have got compared to a magazine review. The Gamertag. If a poster says a game sucks nuts, then we ALL click on his Gamertag, to suss the dude out. Busted, if he has only played one level and he has Shrek The Third in his games list. Granted, some magazines publish the writer's Gamertag with the review, but can you bothered to check the Gamertag after taking a dump? I can't.

Eat While You Play

Take a look at this wonder of modern technology. Someone actually thought there would be a market for this kind of thing. A set of utensils to pick up munchies without putting down the controller. 

Stupid idiot. I mean how are you supposed to pick up your hot beef sandwich with it? Did some real gamer actually test it? They obviously didn't test it while playing Ninja Gaiden II. I guess you could be certified hardcore if you actually picked up a Dorito (even just one) and dipped into a hot Salsa dip,  while you pwn Genshin.  

But a message to the dude who came up with this. (I know this is discriminating, and I might be wrong, but I seriously doubt a girl came up with this. Every girl I know would have gone, "no way, as if, get real, shut up, I don't think so, my ass, etc" if I showed her this gadget. Actually a lot of girls say these words to me, but that's another blog) Buddy, you are aiming at the wrong market. PC gamers heavily into MMO, like World of Warcraft, would buy this. Because they use a mouse and have like a hundred buttons. They can actually physically lift their hand from the keyboard.

As for us console gamers. Make them into chop sticks. Then we can just stab our meatballs to pick them up.

Average Gamer Depressed?

A new report from researchers at the University of Southern California, have concluded that gamers are thinner than your average American, but are more likely to to take drugs and be depressed. Read it here at NewScienceTech

I wonder which gamers they interviewed. Because they missed out on me. Im depressed. I'm depressed about not being able to get 1000 points off Halo 3. I don't take drugs because it makes you lose your....what was it? Oh yeah, that's right, it makes you lose your memory.  As for being thinner than your average American, I have never met any "average" American as I have only had two American girlfriends and they were both crazy. Bonkers. They both thought Bruce Wayne was Batman? Yeah, right I said. So I can't make an informed judgement.

Studies on gamers. I mean what do they actually tell us? Not much that we don't already know. But some people actually get paid to study gamers! Check this story about this professor. She gets a $100,000 from a "struggling government" to study World of Warcraft players. A hundred grand? This money could well be better spent somewhere else than studying MMO players. Like a hundred grand to find out why I'm so crap at Halo 3. 

Domino Master.

What an exciting week on Xbox Live? First Gin and now Domino Master. Well you wouldn't think with this reviewer. He clearly is desperate to get his teeth into something more substantial. Yet he got lumbered with Domino Master and Feeding Frenzy 2. 

I can't see any problems with these two titles. If anything they look like real easy achievement points. Perhaps I should take a break from braining enemies to matching dots and eating fish. Could be calming and therapeutically beneficial to my inner self being. Drink green tea...

What ? Stop it Slam. Wake up. These games suck. They suck like Wii games suck. I think Xbox Live Arcade games are getting worse. This is how Microsoft can rip off 800 points during a lull period of releases. I mean seriously, you can buy Dominoes for 99 cents from Toys R Us. Buy about 20,000 boxes and do the Domino Effect which is way more thrilling than playing it on the Xbox Live. 

But you can play Dominoes live with your friends? Ok, if you had a choice of Gears of War or Domino Master to play live, who  you gonna pick? 

Gin On Xbox Live

I'll have a double then. Gin Rummy, another card game hits Xbox Live Marketplace. I have played a few card games on  Xbox Live and there's one thing you can't do. Well, not well anyway, and that is cheat. What is the point of a card game unless there is a cheat?

I always cheated on strip poker, so how come I can't cheat on Texas Hold'em? It relies on pure luck that you get a good hand. Yes, I know that's the point, but I would still like the option to cheat. There was a cheat on a World Tour Texas Hold'em handheld I bought in Hong Kong for $2 at the airport. It would give you two hands to choose and an extra draw. Nice. Won $500,000 easily.

So with Gin Rummy, is there any cheats? I don't think so. Check the video below. It's a tutorial and the girl has a really nice voice. In fact I watched it three times listening to her, before I actually learnt anything.  I've been squinting trying to see her Gamertag on the video. Invite her, play a game then beat her, obviously. I just need a cheat.

Online Videos by Veoh.com

My Game Is Better Than Yours

Here comes a war. Peter Molyneux, developer of Fable II has bitched about Too Human on Joystiq.  Dennis Dyack, developer of Too Human, "is going to come and kill me now" says Molyneux.

Boys, eh? Always picking fights from the playground to when they grow up heading game companies. My game is better than yours, so lick my crack. Well , that's what I used to say in the playground. Except these days kids carry Glocks into schools, so maybe I wouldn't say that now, but back then it was just a fight in the sandpit.

Then we become teens and we become fanboys. My console is better than yours,  so lick my crack. Up until recently, my HD TV is bigger than yours. Yes, it all stems from the hand held consoles in the playground. I blame the Gameboy. They were so rugged and tough, you could easily throw it at another kids head without the fear of breaking it.  Try doing that now with an iPhone or PSP. 

So if I were Dennis Dyack, I'd go up to Lionhead Studios, with a Gameboy in my hand. Throw it at Peter Molyneux and say go ahead, lick my crack.

 

Lara Croft Topless

Sorry, but the title will give me a high Google rank. But I also had to post this pic of Alison Carroll, the new Lara Croft. Only because my eyes are normally blurry on a Sunday morning. However just to prove my point before, that she is really crap, she holds a gun like your ten year old sister.

Not that ten year old girls should be holding a gun properly, or any ten year old for that matter. I mean she seems a nice enough girl, pretty enough perhaps, (the type of girl you find in the kitchen at parties) but she is not even close. Have a look at these photos from PC Games Hardware site.

Now it might be Sunday morning, or is it my eyes, but is she topless in the photo above? I can't remember Lara ever going topless in the game, because I would have remembered that and humbly whispered "thank you God". But if she is topless, then Eidos, developers of Tomb Raider, must have a stinking game, because this looks like panic marketing. Quick, the game is gonna bomb, sneak in a topless shot. Well, I guess I better go and pre-order then.

Xbox Dashboard Glitched?

Check the pic. See the one message in Major Nelson's inbox? Yeah, that one was from me. No, I didn't send him a message about avatars. There is already a restraining order barring me from doing so. So I don't want to breach it again. It was a message about his dashboard.

If you don't know who Major Nelson is, his real name is Larry Hryb and he is the Director of Programming for Xbox Live. Now here is a guy, in an envious position that he could practically get his hands on any game. Like I mean, ANY game. So this is a mock up of the new dashboard and his score isn't really 1095. (If you check on 360voice.com, he has actually played 336 games with a score about 20, 166) But if you look carefully at the pic, the second page, his All Games score is actually 95! Where did the other 1000 points come from? The dashboard is glitched already!

So if we do the math, you get an extra 1000 for every 95 points? That means for my 52,000 points I will crack over the 556,000 mark and my target for next year. I am beginning to like this update. Like gimmie! I would even make an avatar and wear that 90's fake fur shrunken top and mini ball chain that our Major is wearing. Check it out kids. They've spent millions on these avatars accessories in development and this is what they have come up with. Retro 90's.

But hey if it boosts my Gamerscore, I'd even go naked. Can we go naked with our avatars? Anyone know?

New Halo Boss

Here's another reason to get 1000 points off Halo 3. Microsoft are looking for a program manager for their new Halo Studio Team. Check the link here. (Did they just not close Ensemble, developers of Halo Wars?) I don't want the job. I have already said no. If you want to know why, read my blog about careers in gaming.

But I figured, anyone who has got 1000 points in Halo 3 should go for it. Forget the "expertise with DirectX, Xbox SDK, etc." Just blag it. Get one of those "DirectX for dummies" books or something. If anyone questions your suitability, just remind them you became Spartan General and that should be enough credibility. Bring up your Gamerscore in the interview (unless it is very low) because in today's competitive job market in the gaming industry, your Gamerscore should be your CV of experience.

Went for a job interview once, and got talking with the interviewer about the Xbox 360. Happened to drop my Gamerscore, and he was well impressed. Asked if his 10 year old son could send me a friend request. "Sure" I said. Then I didn't get the job, so I sent a message to his son after rejecting the friend request saying " Ain't life a bitch? My Gamerscore is bigger than yours you crud"

Bad Games Should Get Bad Reviews

An article at GamesRadar, talks to the developers of Kane & Lynch, and the effect of a bad review of the game had on it's team. If you remember, there was controversy of the review Gamestop gave to the game and a writer was fired. This of course created a crapblizzard as Gamestop were accused of putting sponsorship before journalism, seeing there was Kane & Lynch ads all over the site.

Whatever the conspiracy theories, as to why Gamestop pulled the review and fired the writer, they all forget one thing. The game had bad reviews everywhere. I know development teams put in a lot of hard work into games, and it probably hurts when some hack writes it off in a few sentences. But this game deserved it.

I didn't actually read the review. In fact, I didn't read any review and went out and bought it. But as soon as I loaded the disc, I knew it was dung. Why? The game is advertised as co-op, but no online co-op? It was split screen co-op. No one I know, and I mean NO ONE, plays split screen co-op anymore. Not is this day of online co-op. If they had passed it into any decent gamer during development, they would have told them that.

I just wonder who was on the development team in charge of tester feedback? Did they just throw all the negative report logs into the Britney Spears (slang for trash, but maybe replaced by Kane & Lynch soon) and forgot about them? "Like what do they know...kids will still buy it" If you going to spend millions on a game, how about sending a couple of copies to some monkeys first. They will like anything for a couple of bananas and it will make you feel better. Then again monkeys are quite clever, they will also tell you that split-screen sucks.

iPhone Games

My brother the other day bought himself a iPhone and he showed me it's capabilities. If you haven't seen one in action, I guess it has some pretty impressive applications. The first thing I asked was of course, "what games has it got?"

Now my brother is a business graphic designer and photographer, so he was trying to show me it's web applications, the built-in iPod, etc. Yeah, ok, they look cool, but what games has it got? He became clearly frustrated after my constant interjections of "ok, but what games has it got" to " what games can we download?" he finally snapped and said " Look, I haven't got any games for it yet!" My God, I thought. He paid 700 bucks for a phone (which by the way, the actual phone sucks because you can hardly hear anything) and not even one game on it. Like are we from the same family?

Intrigued, I have searched for a video to show what games are actually on it. Here's a link. Apple being totally paranoid wont let me embedded it and so you have to click "see games in action" It's actually an iPod touch video, but same thing. Like wow. Imagine if Microsoft and Apple got together and allowed Xbox Live on it. (It may never happen because they are constantly at war , but then Nintendo and Sega eventually got in bed together over a Wii?) It would totally halo hump all over the PSP!

Gears of War2 Gun Sounds

This is the kind of stuff you talk about in the pub. How to make violence sound real. But of all sources to find this video a Gears of War 2 exclusive. Maxim.com. I only visit the site purely for research purposes, mind you.

I once had almost the exact conversation on a date recently. The sound of guns and breaking bones in movies and games. How a sub-woofer on a surround 5.1 system really booms a pump shotgun or cracks the skull into imaginable pieces of bone falling on the floor. My date wasn't too interested in the subject for some reason. I didn't know what her problem was. I think it was that time of the month. She completely lost interest when I started to talk about flem in my throat makes a good horror sound. Some people just don't know how to keep a conversation, eh?

World Ends With Atom Smasher

Looking forward to Call of Duty 5 or Fable 2 when they are released? Can't wait for until November for Gears of War 2? Well forget it. Because this Thursday the world will probably end due to some scientists wanting to smash some atom, thus creating a Black Hole sucking the whole planet into oblivion. Read the source here.

Forget planning to finish Lego Indiana or pre-ordering Viva Pinata : Trouble in Paradise. A multi-billion dollar Large Hadron Collider, a 17 mile long ring that will try re-enacting the Big Bang Theory by firing protons or something, will see that you never play anything anymore. Actually the eight thousand physicists working on the project, on the border of Germany and Switzerland, say the chances of it creating a Black Hole are slim. Like a billion-trillion-thrillion to one. Well, I still don't like those odds.

If you look at the photo, the thing looks scary. I actually have no idea what it actually does, but it looks like it belongs in a Halo map pack. In fact that is what I am going to do tonight. Play and finish Halo 3. Because if I die on Thursday , at least I can say I got a 1000 points off Halo 3.

The Game Spanks Bow Wow on Madden 09

Guys, eh? Bet $100,000 on a video game. This is just an update on Madden 09 showdown between hip hop artists The Game and Bow Wow. Read my post here if you missed it.

I guess The Game got the game. 55 - 23 was the score and Bow Wow will need to crawl under a rock and pay out. Here's the video on YouTube. Only guys would be stupid enough to bet a hundred grand on a video game outcome. I should know. I am one. Then again I do believe it is a gamer instinct to take up challenges. Guys always pick a fight when our gaming skills come into question.

You only have to listen to the trash talk in an online multi-player match or the "trolls" that lurk around gaming forums, that end up challenging you to deathmatch of something. (If you are wondering what a "troll" is, it is someone who responds to all forum posts with any negativity with the sole purpose to gain a reaction) Bring it on then. Let's settle this. Most of the time, they never materialize unless you got a hundred grand to bet. See above.

But the best thing about Xbox Live is that no one knows where you live. So all the threats to "bust your ass" can seem quite hollow. My mate SHADYSHEEDY has the perfect solution. Always calmly reply with every threat "And ? What are you gonna do about it?"

Mugged for A PS3?

Here's someone who forgot somehow to pay his brain bill. A unidentified man approached a large group of thirty people on a street corner after dark with his PS3 and then was assaulted, with brass knuckles. They then took his PS3. I somehow don't think they were Xbox fanboys though. Read it here.

Maybe if he had a Wii under his arm, he wouldn't have got assaulted. Maybe picked on, teased and called a girl, but seriously, the mind boggles what this unidentified 18 year old was thinking? When I queued for the Playstation 2 on release, I immediately took a cab home, with the Playstation wrapped under a blanket. Wore a balaclava so no one would **** with me. Mind you, if I wore a balaclava today in the street, there would be counter-terrorist team pointing an Uzi at my head telling me to get down on the floor. But back then, I was taking no chances.

This time around with my Xbox 360, I had each delivered (Core and Elite). Wore a balaclava when I answered the door so no one would **** with me.

Bow Wow vs The Game Madden 09 Battle

It's comforting to know that sometimes a hip hop battle will not end in with a drive-by shooting. Music artists Bow Wow and The Game have challenged each other to a battle on Madden 09 on the Xbox 360. The battle begins today at a secret location. Read more about it here.

This has been billed as the biggest Madden 09 showdown ever. Both have posted challenges via YouTube as who is the true champion of Madden football. The Game says he is the number one PS3 Madden 09 player on the EA sports board, while Bow Wow says he will kick The Games butt on the Xbox 360.

Kids, these days. Always want to be king of the block or housing estate. To be honest, I am not too familiar with their music. I am too busy playing video games to know who these two artists are. But if you ask me... whatever. I am guessing there is only ten people playing Madden 09 on the PS3 so maybe that rank is not so hard? Bow Wow in a YouTube video shows off his crib and he only owns a Core system. I mean with all that cash flashing, shouldn't he invest in a Elite at least? Just a thought.

Playboy Model Jo Garcia Talks Final Fantasy

Check the video posted below. Playboy model Jo Garcia talks in depth about Final Fantasy. Would you ? I would. If there was nothing on TV, I would. I'd check the TV guide first just in case there is a re-run of He-Man and Masters of Universe, but I definitely would. Yes, I would definitely take her out and talk about Final Fantasy.

Would I date her? I don't know. If you look closely, one of her fingernails is crooked. Kind of puts me off. But what just might keep me interested is that book she writes notes in. I'd call her and then ask her to bring that book. I would then bring along my own book and say "That's nothing right. Check this bad boy out" Slam it down on the table.

To be honest, she probably has a boyfriend that goes to the gym or gun club, so I guess I would be safe, she wouldn't try to hit on me (I hate when that happens. Girls that flirt while I am trying to talk gaming). But Jo, if you are reading this, Final fantasy XIII is coming to the Xbox 360. Send me a friend request and I just might accept it. No guarantee though.

See more gamer videos at PWN or DIE

Drugs Testing for Achievements

I said it should happen. Back in March, the Empire (Microsoft) sent in the stormtroopers on Gamesaving Cheats. Read my blog entry here. and at my site. I said it wouldn't be too long before they start testing gamers for drug abuse on getting achievements.

They haven't yet, but they are considering doing dope testing at the World Cyber Games, which is the first step. The World Cyber Games is basically the Olympics for computer video games. Players compete every year for prize money. Read the article here. Nevermind testing at the tournaments yet, what about those getting stoned playing Xbox at home? This is where it all starts. Grass roots (if you forgive the pun).

Fair enough if they use a cheat code or glitch to get an achievement, but there should be an IQ test after getting an achievement on those Gamertags that sound like stoners. MasterStoner or ResidentStoner et al. Even maybe some of those Gamertags that sound remotely tree hugging or vegan. That's right, your achievements are being watched.

Fable 2 Hours From Gold

Fable 2, a game I am looking forward to release, is "hours from gold". Gold is a stage in video game development when a final master is produced and then the game is ready to be packaged and shipped. Developers get slightly nervous at this stage, as the last chance to iron out any bugs is gone.

I love it when they say it is "hours" from gold. Lionhead, the developers of Fable 2, have also said "We have one or two bugs that are keeping us from going gold" Why do I love it ? Because I can see them frantically doing late night overtime trying to work out a bug or glitch. It is probably some stupid glitch like no head appears or a character AI has gone loopy. When they say "one or two bugs" which normally translate to a ton of real annoying ones.

Video games now are so massive and complicated, bugs and glitches are so part of the norm of development. But I like glitches in games sometimes. The tiny ones like in Fable 2 Pub Games where you can earn lots of cash and totally change the way you will play Fable 2. The money you earn in pub games can be carried over to Fable 2. So with the glitch, I will enter Fable 2 as a millionaire!

Yes, I love it when the developers say they are hours from gold. Because so am I!